its 2010......

Im a 26 year old photographer living in Dubai.

Last year was pretty tough for everyone. People were getting fired , clients had no money for shoots, and there was very little work going around . to be honest I'm bored SILLY !
The type of shoots i do in Dubai are pretty standard and boring. I feel i have lost my creativity because everytime you wanna do something different , you get struck down by the art director or magazine editor. Your ideas are to edgy , to risky and to creative . For a photographer these are words that kill your soul and your mind.

There is nothing you can do . If you live in Dubai you must follow the strict conservative rules.
So .... what do you do ?

Well, we have thought long and hard and have decided to move. L.A seems to be a awesome option with Spain as a close second.

But in order to move to these locations you need alot of money. If i could rob a bank i would !
But instead you have to plan exactly how you gonna make that cash. You need a goal and a deadline.

So i have decided to start doing things that can help me in the future with my goals.

On my next post i will make a list of my personal missions . My mission that will make moving out of Dubai possible. I have until the end of the year to accomplish everything on my list.

I do love starting things , but sadly never finish . So this time , i will be tracking my missions on the blog !

blogging boobs ramadan adventures

Fellow readers ... i would like to dedicate today's blog to Ramadan. A holy month for the Muslims. And a month of hell for all non-muslims. 21st of August to 21st of September

Luckily this year i have decided to leave this holy hypercritical city and go home to Cape Town.

Ramadan is a 1 month religious quest for muslims. They fast during the day and as soon as the sun sets they over indulge in food and drink.

There are many rules during this holy month. If you are caught smoking , drinking ( any liquids) or eating in public during the daylight hours you will receive a fine of 2000 DHS or risk getting arrested until the end of Ramadan. To me this is the biggest load of shit known to man. Can you imagine not drinking any water for the entire day when temperatures are 40 plus degrees.

If you are a muslim then of course this is your religion .. so follow it. But for about 80% of the people living in Dubai who are non muslims - this is bullshit. Why are we being forced to follow this religion when in fact this is not our religion. This is there country.. yes.. but in our country we dont force muslims to abide to our Religion and our rules. When we try .. well we all know what happens.

There excuse is.... We are fasting ...so you can't eat , otherwise you will temp us . But isnt the whole purpose of fasting, an attempt to overcome temptation. If a Muslim sees a non-Muslim eating.. it should serve as a lesson in self control . But instead .. all these rules are making fasting easy when in fact it should be difficult...

a quote taken from a website . What's the point of fasting

The reason Muslims fast is to discipline their body and mind. The absence of food and drink and other pleasures provides a perfect opportunity to concentrate on prayer and worship. Not having the luxuries of life to hand makes it easier to reflect on life and be grateful for what we do have. Muslims use this month to start afresh and give their life a new direction?

a comment from a muslim

n September 24, 2006 at 3:05 am Roba wrote:

I’m actually quite happy to hear that news. Although I do fast, I don’t see the point of enforcing fasting and alcohol bans on people who don’t fast and who would rather consume alchol. Eshi bein il wa7ed o rabo, and regardless of whether it’s an Islamic country or not, no one should meddle in people’s personal choices.

spot on !! and thats the comment from a muslim. i agree 100%

Another thing that confuses me. Why would there be a ban on loud music and dancing ?Are they trying to enforce people to have no fun at all . I dont see the point. Secondly why do woman have to wear more respectable clothes during the months of Ramadan...? I was recently stopped at Mall of the Emirates because i was wearing a vest that exposed my shoulders... My boobs were hanging out the front of my vest but she was only concerned about my shoulders. I told her that i will only stop wearing these vests, if they stop selling them in the mall. If you sell it , im gonna buy them. How can a Country tell its residents what to wear ... its pathetic

My theory on Ramadan . If I decided to go on a strict diet. This would be my choice. I wouldn't tell all the people around me that eating in my view is prohibited because i might get tempted to cheat my diet. Cheating on your own diet , is your problem because you only cheating yourself. So bluntly speaking - this is Ramadan , and its your choice. Don't force it upon us.

blogging boobs

This is brain .... a few weeks ago Dave my brother noticed that a mother cat had given birth to a litter of kittens in his garden. There were only two kittens that survived. Gus and Brain. Brain was half the size of Gus and obviously the weaker of the two. Unfortunately a few weeks later Gus was killed by a car, and Brain became a permanent resident of villa 69. Brain is now 10 weeks old.

After visiting Dave a few times i decided to get

a kitten. What i really wanted was a dog but unfortunately the dog i want is illegal in Dubai

( a staffie or a pitbull) So i decided to wait until i get to L.A before getting my dog of choice. So i figured a kitten will do , but i would raise it as a dog ....

I figure if you buy a harness and start walking it like a dog and take it for cruises in the

car it will become brave and get use to the whole traveling thing. I even wanted to take it on shoots with me, like a use to with my dog.

I contacted Feline Friends

and selected a kitten that was 9 weeks old. I went to the foster parents to collect the new addition, and spent 20 minutes trying to catch the bugger. Eventually after bribing him with biltong , i managed to catch him and threw him in the box

While driving i was trying to figure out how something so small could make such a fucking noise. It meowed like a male alley cat searching for females to abuse. We arrived home and immediately named it JESUS. A very

appropriate name seeing thats all that came out of

our mouths JEEEEESSSSSSSSSUUUUUSSSSSSSSSS SHUT UP!!!! Besides keeping us up all night for two nights , Jesus would not stop meowing. I tried working at home and couldn't even write an email because the ear pearcing noise

was to much. Then i figured out that she wasnt 9 weeks old , in fact she was 6 months old - hardly a kitten. I was wondering why she was so big !

Unfortunately we had to give the cutie back to its foster

parents who ended up adopted her. So she has a good home and i can work in silence.

blogging boobs

I read 7 days this morning and found a few interesting articles.

Manhunt is on - Two security guards left there security van carrying 2 million DHS unattended while they filled an ATM machine in Sharjah. Personally , i think they left

the keys in the car with the engine running to keep the aircon going in the car. Some random person jumped in the car and drove away. I wish i found the unattended van because i would be 2 million DHS richer - never trust a south african with a van full of money !

I have photographed many editorials where jewellery has has arrived with security guards because each item is priced between 1 and 10 million DHS . Fuck .... the amount of times it crossed my mind to snatch the jewellery and drive straight to the airport. If only i had steel balls ! and a fucking fast car !

Another interesting article - In a Paris swimming pool a young muslim woman wearing a burqini ( it looks like an abiya but its waterproof ) was refused entry into the pool. I suspect there will be strikes and violent riots around Paris , to show just how pissed off the muslim community is. Most riots start up because of religion and sports. But in South Africa there are many riots and strikes and 99 % of the time they end in violence. Why is this ? is it because

of sports ... sometimes ... is it because of religion ... not really .... well then what is the real reason ...? its all political ... Over the years i have witnessed a few of these riots / strikes and the individuals striking seem to have very little intelligence. They jump around like baboons , screaming at the top of the lungs and trying to make as much noise as possible, they pick up rocks and throw them at each other or at car / shop windows and they h

ave been know to stab each other with knives. mmmm interesting ..... Im glad i stay far away from religion , sports and politics. I only involve myself in such conversations when i have had large amounts of red wine... or white wine ... and then only my opinion counts and no one elses

But on a brighter note . I picked up my Hasselblad H3 yesterday with a 35 mm , 80 mm and 100 mm lens ! this is not a camera .. its a machine ! People say they would give up sex ... if they could get this camera . i wouldn't ..... but its a close call.

My day has been ass-fucking boring , so the only thing i could write in my blog today was info from 7 days ( 7days.ae ) and my personal opinion on riots... and a bit of a brag about my new camera ... fuck this is a winning blog!!!

Im traveling to Johannesburg on the 22nd of August to meet my fiancee's mom and kids. Then heading down to the mothercity to shoot 50 new shots for my portfolio. I cant fucking wait to get to a city where the models are beautiful and plentiful, locations are incredible and the light is crisp and perfect! And there are a few other things im looking forward to .... but unfortunately cant mention them in my blog !

the blogging bOObs -

I have a few things i would like to write about today .

Yesterday I spent the day with my friend in 45 degree weather , on a construction site, with tight jeans , shoes, a hard hat and my camera , shooting buildings etc . I almost passed out a few times when the heat took over consciousness of my brain. It was great fun and so awesome to finally have a camera in my hands again after not shooting for 1.5 months. Here's a mission - try climbing onto a 1 metre high wall in tight jeans , in mid summer dubai - fucking impossible .

Your legs are sweating so much that your jeans stick to your legs like super glue ! So you end up looking like a fucking retard attempting this difficult mission - you cannot lift your leg !

After yesterdays awesome shoot I would like to congratulate myself for getting out of my hole that i have been in for the last 4 months ! Thanks recession for reducing my amount of work and bank balance to zero. But thank you and fuck you Emirates Bank for giving me 2 gold credit cards with ridiculous amounts of credit. Not only did i have ZERO in my bank but now im in huge debt ! Although ... i wasn't complaining while sucking down champagne in Paris and charging it to the " O great Visa card "

It was more like " Garcon another bottle ... make that two " ;)

I should have realized that credit cards were problems. My first experience - i was 17 years old ,

i was given 250 000 rand by an investor to buy photographic equipment in New York for my rental company i was starting in Cape Town. my mom approved a credit card for me cause i was a minor. The bank informed me that this was a special credit card - a credit card that offers no credit , i can only use the money that is in my credit card account - which was 250 000 rand

what they never told me, was that it was linked to my mom and dads account.

So off i went ... Hello B&H photo store - i bought a load of gear and never calculated the amount i had left in the card - but remembered what the bank told me - you cannot go into debt. I arrived back in Cape Town and checked my balance on the card .... - 65 000 rand !!

I was 17 so had no way of paying this back immediately so the bank cleared my mom and dads account to pay the debt. I was left with loads of new camera gear , very pissed off parents and

a credit card that was cut in two by my mother !

Now once again , i have two credit cards and im in debt .... But luckily this time im at the age where i can pay my debt off with ease.

Recently i have noticed how many loosers, chancers and lurkers are on facebook !

a few emails from facebook randoms

email 1

I'm not that good at writing emails to strangers but bear with me. I saw your profile and there was something about it that caught my eyes. Maybe it was you putting some other peoples pictur

es as yours and that tells me alot about you, I am scared from you, i don't know if you are 300 pounds or if you have hairy hands or if you are a psycho, I have a feeling that there is more to you than your looks but lets see if you're as nice, interesting and attractive as you are in the pictures.

I'm willing to bet you that you've gotten about 1650 emails so far from guys saying something like: hi, hi, my name is Ahmed and I like long walks on the beach, cuddling and i love you. If that's what you're used to then this email is refreshing.

I'm not one to talk about myself too much but I'm tall, have my act together, artist and I'm really funny. So if you don't like to laugh then we're in trouble.

Worst case? you might make a cool friend, so lets get together for a drink/coffee sometime...

Momi illusions

P.S. I have a good relationship with my mom, nice teeth and nice shoes ;/

email 2 - does this dude think he stands a chance ...?

email 3 - what fucking ad ?? loosers anonymous ..?

email 4 - a medal for being pathetic

Some advice - loose weight , get plastic surgery , buy a book on improving social skills and get out there and be a man. I have had a 3some request from a girl and her boyfriend , i had a violent stalker that ended up threatening me and my brother with violence if he saw us in public. So yeah there are plenty freaks out there ! but hell it makes life interesting !

the blogging bOObs

just so you all know .. this is my first blog in ages .. so dont expect much ..

Im quite clearly bored in Dubai at the moment. So im entertaining my thoughts with writing.
Anything to distract my mind from the thought of summer in Dubai, the thought of actually living in a desert , which has very little culture ( non of which interests me ) and temperatures that rise to 55 degrees celsius with 100 % humidity , many many restrictions , no freedom of speech, a land with many hypocrites and zero character . Now im sure there are a few of you getting a little hot under the collar with what i just said ... so relax ... if this upsets you .. kindly press close window ... and stop reading my fucking blog ! i am a number one fan of freedom of speech. So much so that
my friends have banned me from drinking red wine in public , due to my mouth turning into a machine gun of personal comments and opinions . fuck it , lifes to short to keep things to yourself .

Anyway ... There are a few things that are good about Dubai. mmmmm let me think long and hard. ok ok .. well 4 years ago when i arrived from Cape Town i only had model tests in my book , and i was given the chance to shoot major campaigns and celebrities like Dita von Teese ( ok only one celebrity) . I earned enough money here to support my high maintenance lifestyle and to afford 6 months living in Paris ( which was awesome ). I discovered new ways to light shoots , i have met a load of awesome cool people that have becomegood friends, i discovered the Friday Brunch and i appreciate aircon in a big way ! But most importantly I met my Fiancee here !
and he is by far the best thing that has ever happened to me !

mmmmm.... what else ... well today has been a lazy Saturday after a wee party last night involving combinations of beer , vodka and jagermeister. Im illegally downloading TV series's and movies and i ate a Masafi 4 cheese chips and Haagen Das ice cream ( just in case you were wondering )

But right now , im heading to an apartment to meet my new kitty which we have named JEsus !
Which is probably something we gonna be screaming when he vomits up hairballs on our couch or knocks my coffee all over my laptop ... its bound to happen and the name fits the action !

i hope you enjoyed my useless info for the day - I will be putting up shots of new shoots i have done so each day wont just be filled with my party schedules or eating habits !

China Town Scouting

Im shooting on Wednesday and Friday. Wednesday's shoot is for the Tatianas - a Indie , Rock band situated in Paris. Pierre is 18 years old ( middle ) is the lead singer and song writer. Timothee ( left) is the bassist. Lois ( right ) is drums. Flora Richard is there manager. A band with huge potential

Friday's shoot is for the band, Neimo. Neimo is everything you want them to be: cocky, brash, fashionable, raw, and loud. In other words, Neimo rocks. Neimo have just been signed by U.S based Shangri-la music a new music company headed by Jeff Ayeroff. Neimo is launching there second album “Modern Incidental” it is set for release this Spring. This deal will give them the chance to move to New York permantly and develope a fan base over there.

So the shoot im doing with them is rather different to what i would usually shoot. Or shall i say it just up my alley !! My concept is to have a japanese geisha oddly placed in the frame with them. Rock band versus geisha. I searched all over for the perfect specimen, and finally while browsing my friend GiGi Cheng's facebook friends i came across Crystal Ko. A perfect chinese geisha ( we will make her look japanese ) I met her for coffee the other night and asked the question. What is the difference between Japanese/Chinese/Korean ?? Alot of people get offended when i ask, and yes i have asked many times, but i never remember. They got there fingers and started pulling there eyes into weird directions , this is Chinese - straight slit eyes, this is japanese - slanted up slit eyes , and this is korean - slanted down slit eyes. They explained that most of the time they dont even know. So now i dont feel bad at all.

My second mission was to get a Kimono ( japanese robe ). I searched on the internet and only the first entry i found started like this - With the triumphant air of a sportsman who has landed his fish after a long and bitter struggle. yeah i figured that this was going to be a difficult task. I emailed my japanese Landlord Masako Sauliere and she forwarded my request to a few of her japanese friends. After 1 day i got an email from Gerald Menager, one of the partners from Kimonoya. Kimonoya is a shop in Paris that sells handcrafted traditonal japanese clothes and ornaments. Gerald told me to contact his wife Machi to enquire about the clothes. I phoned her today and arranged to rent the Kimono for 50 euro , but can probably get it cheaper.
Second mission completed

Third mission - Makeup artist and Hair stylist. I emailed makeup schools all over Paris, and have had no luck finding someone. I am desperate , and im already talking about doing the geisha makeup myself. I am hoping someone will help me. The reason i cant find anyone is because this whole shoot is a freebie.

fourth mission. I went location scouting for my 2 shoots yesterday. I decided to go to Chinatown in the 13th district. The 13th district, on the left bank, is really not my cup of tea although i think every district of Paris is small and unique in its own way. In the late 1970's and early 1980's this district really took off with the arrival of the "boat people" from Vietnam. This district had fallen victim to the depressing urban development started under the Gaullist government. This working class neighborhood was torn down and replaced by impersonal and ugly high rise buildings. No true Parisian can be found in this concrete jungle. But the Chinese people call it home, well there new promised land. The rents are cheap, there is plenty of space. They have built there own city - even the Mc Donalds takeaway looks like a chinese temple. There are over 150 restaurants in this southeastern part of Paris. Its definitely a place to visit. Just dont go on a Monday as its rather quiet and uninteresting. I did enjoy seeing the old Chinese woman with white hair selling fruit on the side of the road. I took a few pics to show you.

But I have definitely discovered the best place for my neimo shoot. Near the statue of liberty in Paris. Yes, Paris has 2 statues of liberty. We were watching National Treasury - book of secrets
( in france they call it Benjamin Gates et le livres des secrets ) on night and Benjamin gates discovered a clue on the statue of Liberty in Paris. Me and Brad both looked at each other in confusion, and said " i didnt know that !!" . Great so thats our location for our next shoot. Seeing Neimo has just been signed by a New York based company, this would be a good concept New York versus Paris. mmm..

The Statue of Liberty was presented by the people of France to the people of the United States in 1886 to honor the friendship between the two nations. Today, it is recognized as a symbol of liberty throughout the world. mmmm.. interesting. odd i wonder how the people of France feel about the american citizens. I dont think there is much love there. in fact, i know there's not.
It was established as a national monument in 1924. It underwent an extensive $86 million renovation, just in time for the Statue's 100th birthday in 1986. More than 5 million people visit the statue each year.